the morning after

i'm not sure if this whole piece is going to make sense but it'll most likely turn out to be random ramblings at best.

i had such fun with G last nyt - it was probably as perfect as perfect could get. had something to eat, watched a movie, had time to hit the mall to windowshop and find more about each others' preferences & my personal favorite - hang around a quiet corner to smoke and talk. the art of communicating with another person, in my opinion, seems to be a dying art. it's so ironic that as the media for communication broadened at a dizzying pace than ever before, it becomes all the more harder to say what's really inside your head.

the moment you've been waiting for the last couple of days has arrived and the date went swimmingly well, you're now forced to confront -- the morning after.

it feels weird to be dating someone you're working with. it's as if your whole being feels a wide gamut of emotions all at the same time - excitement because I have someone new; paranoia about everyone else finding out; awkwardness because of the near proximity that you have; uncertainty on where the two of you stand or even where you're headed; fear of the repercussions of your actions whether you intended them or not.

in the past, i've hooked up with a guy that's working for the same company but it's the first time that I've gone out with a person working for the same account. i'm not one to complain but i sometimes have way too many in my head to appreciate what is right in front of me. i should be happy that i found someone that meets my qualifications, hell, it's probably even way too early in the 'relationship' to start worrying or to give a damn but i just can't help it. seeing G's relationship with another co worker crumble both publicly and privately at the same time just pushes forward the hesitation in me.

i don't know what to do or who to talk to with what i fell but i hope i find the answer soon... and fast

The Spirit of Cosmo

I've always considered myself as a somewhat private person, the type that clings to the idea of privacy. I must admit though, I am enthralled at the rush that I get when people from the different circles that I am in talks about me... especially the racy little details that cause quite a stir ;p

Last nights events would definitely be etched in my mind for a long time to come. It started out wild what with me and my equally adventurous friend Cathy and a couple of other friends (well, ok, technically speaking they were just acquaintances as I only met them last night) partied the night away at the Cosmo Batchelor Bash. The guys, I must say, are definitely delish - straight out of Carrie Bradshaw's world into my own. Never mind that they were merely eye candy, they probably wouldn't last long with me if it ever translates into a relationship in the real world.

The highlight of my evening happened after I attended the Cosmo bash. Me and my fellow Sykes employees Trinity, CJ (the cute but gay guy), April and Leslie S took a cab from The Fort as we were all going the same direction. April, Leslie S and CJ dropped me and Trinity off at our Burgundy site - Trinity still has a shift at 2 am and me, well, I just didn't want to go home. It is true that my folks are already asleep and that I didn't want to wake them up just so I could get into the house. The bigger reason that I didn't want to go home is because I know that G, this co-worker I'm currently digging, is there and that I would be able to get away with hanging out with him the whole night.

I found him sleeping in his station as everything is running ever so smoothly on the floor (he's with the ops team and the only time that they are busy is if there is a system issue). I woke him up to ask him if he has a charger because my phone went dead. It was a lame excuse but it worked. Turns out, he didn't have a charger but we ended up just talking in his work station until the other charger becomes available (apparently there was a queue on who's going to be using it). We went down to our place to smoke and since I was kinda hungry, I asked him as well to accompany me to go grab something to eat. We ended up in KFC where his boss D and his team mate R saw the both of us alone together. At the back of my mind I knew they were grilling him on what's the score because us being together constantly is very evident these past few weeks. Besides, he wouldn't have gone out of the fast food joint if they were going to talk about something else.

Pretty soon, boss D and team mate R left, opting to buy food from McDonalds instead of waiting in line for what seemed like forever over at KFC. We went back to our buliding and found that were all alone in the elevator. I confronted G about a confidential piece of info about him that I found out from my team lead Y (a couple of weeks back, Y told me that when she was bugging Geoff about hooking him up with someone, he specifically mentioned my name). We talked and finally cleared the issue and went to our place to smoke after I ate my dinner (F, the person seated next to him was there so we were not able to talk much). G & I ended up making out and officially confirmed that we were dating.

I texted Cathy about it and she kidded that it was probably the spirit of Cosmo. Maybe, maybe not. I have a nagging suspicion, though, it was the spirit of vodka (one of the sponsors for the Cosmo bash) that somehow lingered on me.